i squeezed in a little of my QT during TC. i'm sorry. i must have some mild case of ADHD or maybe i simply lack self-discipline, but i could not sit still during the joint community/campus leaders time. so i slipped in a little Bible reading and journaling.
the new testament passage for saturday's BRP was John 9. i remember reading through that passage several years ago as a college senior and being touched by the passage because i was thinking of my own struggles and bondages at the time, and i had wondered the very same question posed in verse 2: " ' Rabbi,' his disciples asked him, 'why was this man born blind? Was it because of his own sins or his parents' sins?' " (NLT). why was i struggling with feelings of depression, of worthlessness? why was i struggling with these bondages? and why was this going on for so long? why did i feel so trapped? was it because of me? b/c i messed up? did i do something wrong? why, God? why?!
" 'It was not because of his sins or his parents' sins,' Jesus answered. 'This happened so the power of God could be seen in him' " (John 9.3, NLT). i remember reading that verse several years ago and being so comforted. i was going through these struggles so that the power of God could be seen in me. God would redeem, restore, and heal me to show the fullness of His glory. my suffering at that time would reveal His power in the future. from the beginning, from this blind man's birth, God had a plan for restoration and healing all along.
i believe that the way Jesus healed each person in the Bible was sovereign and purposeful. if this blind man gets his own passage in the Gospel of John, then his case is no different. maybe i'm looking too much into this, but is this not the ultimate symbol of God - Christ's death and resurrection, the washing away of all our sins? for me, the mud and dirt on the man's eyes represents the man's sin. "....For dust you are and to dust you will return" (Genesis 3.19b, NIV). Our flesh = ground. and by putting this mud and dirt on the man's eyes, Jesus brings to the light the man's sin. the reality of his sin is before the guy. and then, in verse 7a, Jesus instructs the man to go wash himself in the pool of Siloam, and after he washes himself, after the dirt and mud are washed away, the man can see. The sin was completely washed away. is that not the ultimate power of God -- the complete washing away of our sins? i think this is the "power of God" that is seen in the blind man that Jesus is referring to in verse 3. not just the power of a miraculous healing, but the power of the miraculous healing over our sin and our old selves.
and the awesome thing about this passage is that after the blind man was healed, the people -- his own neighbors and acquaintances -- could not recognize him:
"His neighbors and others who knew him as a blind beggar asked each other, 'Isn't this the man who used to sit and beg?' Some said he was, and others said, 'No, he just looks like him!' But the beggar kept saying, 'Yes, I am the same one!' " (John 9.8-9, NLT).
this man wasn't simply healed from his blindness. he was completely transformed. he was so transformed that people couldn't recognize the new him.
in an earlier post, i wrote about the blind man Jesus healed in Mark 8.22-25, a passage that really resonated with me and a passage that i related with. once again, i find myself connecting and relating with this other blind man. coming here to ann arbor almost 6 years ago, God's plan had always been a plan of restoration and healing. when God broke and humbled me, He was putting the mud on my eyes and bringing to light the dirtiness of my sin -- my self-glory, my insecurities, my people-pleasing, my hunger for the love and accolades of people, my selfishness, my pride, etc. and then, He washed me clean. all those years of bondage revealed to me the depravity of my sin, brought me closer to God, brought me into a love relationship with Christ. and i went to the pool of siloam and i washed myself. and now, i can see. i see what really matters. i see the beauty and glory of God. i see that God is worthy of my life. i see the love and grace of God. i see that i need to be less and that Christ must greater. i see that all of life comes down to knowing and loving God more. i see that eternal investments are where it's really at. i see that the greatest treasure is a love relationship with God. now, i see.
i see. who i was as a freshman many years ago is so different from who i am now. i hope and pray that my friends and family from back home will see that as well when i return home next month. and i hope that they won't be able to recognize this new me.
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