2/2: spiritual battle, splinter, shlee, how He loves BS

so at life group chapel a couple days ago, while we were praying for lg, i felt like the Spirit was really just charging that room....and then this image of this dark figure putting a gun to my head came up, and i kinda freaked out a little before pushing the thought out.  im not one of those crazy prophetic prayer warriors so its pretty rare when i get such vivid images.  while we were closing out, i couldnt deny the fact that the image wasnt just a random thought but i think a warning from God of the spiritual battle that is to come.  i think God has been blessing our life group abundantly lately, answering so many prayers, and i can understand that Satan is prolly pretty pissed.  i guess the reality of spiritual battle hasnt ever really presented itself in such a visual manifestation to me before....but im thankful that God has provided us the means to defend and fight back.  as i was praying about this scary image God had warned me with, He reminded me that yea, as we are mere chaff in the wind, we're toast against the spiritual authorities and principalities of the evil world....but Christ's victory lives in us, He's given us spiritual armor, and thats something i hope i can remind not only myself, but also my life group in the coming challenges and trials to come. 

i had a nice phone date with splinter aka ruth lin yesterday afternoon.  it was so good being able to share all that God did in Chile and how He's freed me.  as i was sharing with her, i started blubbering like a crazed seal, and i think the reason why i was such a mess while i was sharing with her is because she was there when i was at my worst.  she was there when i was struggling with the very dark thoughts and crippling insecurities that God had set me free from after the Chile missions trip.  she was there, and because she knew how horrible they were before, she could completely share in my joy and thanksgiving in the newfound joy and freedom God has given me.  i remember all the prayers she used to cry out for me -- and God heard, and im so happy to share with her how He has decided to answer them all at this sovereign time.

idk....im just so thankful for her, period.  im thankful that God has blessed me with this awesome relationship with this older sister.  when she last visited in december, i was asking some of my peers if they had older sister friendships like the one i have with splinter.  and i realized how rare it is.  a lot of people come and go here in ann arbor and from the ministry here at HMCC, and theres definitely that danger of losing touch or just the fading element of any relationship affected by the double whammy of distance and time.  this is how i know its God behind this sisterhood b/c not only has the love been maintained between us, but i feel like this love has been strengthened, despite the fact that 2 years have passed where we've been living in 2 completely different cities.  im so thankful because i can still share and testify with her, and she can genuinely share in that.  and whats more is that when she shares, i still continue to learn so much from her -- i still learn so much from the way she lives her life, from the way she testifies, from the way she shares honestly, from the way she processes through things, from teh way she genuinely tries to follow God.  thank you so much, God!  thank you so much for continuing this "discipleship" in ways that i could never have imagined. 

me and splinter many many many years ago :)

afterwards, i met with shlee.  :)  aw, i love shlee.  idk if she knows how much i see God's love in her life.  it was just a casual meetup, but while she was talking, i was remembering the first day i met up with her 2 years ago in spring/summer lg....we were sitting on the grass in the diag.  and im remembering the things she shared then and thinking of our meetup at trusty old starbucks on south university yesterday -- man, God has really grown her so much.  aww....God loves her so much...its crazy!  He has transformed her and changed her sooooo much.  the way she used to view God, the things that were high on her heart....all of that has completely changed.  now there is a greater desire, a heart that is trying to obey and love God first and foremost, and to be able to see that....its awesome.  God has grown her so much....gosh, look at this woman of growing faith!  yay shlee!  and yay God!  =)

had life group afterwards.  yay.  oh man....im so filled with thankfulness when i think about this life group.  last week, the day after lg, i was driving to work, and i dont know why...maybe it was just that time of month...but i was completely blown away by how good God has been to our group, and it brought me to tears.  seriously, God.  this is how i know that this group is not mine or david's...it truly is yours.  because your love and your power and your will and what you wanna do in these members' lives....You're gonna do it despite my weaknesses, despite how lame i am as a leader and older sister.  Your love is independent of how i "perform" as a shepherd.  and thats awesome.  You love them sooo much.  so much. 

He has taken this group sooooo far.  we really had some humble beginnings.  i remember God reassuring me in my prayers in the beginning of the school year that i should be thankful to have humble beginnings...b/c its only through a humble beginning that there's the possibility of huge potential and the room for God to work.  if everythings all set, fine, and dandy from the very start, there's no room for God's power, you know?  oh man i remember truly how humble the Blind Side beginnings were.  but for some reason, ever since returning from winter break, God has been answering prayers and blessing like crazy....im seriously like...wtheck?  wheres this coming from?  specific prayers too....one prayer i remember lifting up pretty consistently throughout all of last semester's lg chapel times was something along the lines of, "God, help us to be a group where we are truly interceding for one another, where we're carrying each other's burdens in prayer, where there are tears in our eyes b/c we're that burdened for one another."  and omg.  that first night back from winter break, there was this beautiful breakthrough of vulnerability.  people were sharing very personal struggles and things going on, and as we were praying for one another, that room was just filled with the answered prayer of true intercession - of carrying one another's burdens as tears fell from our eyes.  i left that place so in awe of God.  and since that week, week after week, im seeing more and more of how God has been answering prayers -- whether its greater unity in laughter, seeing the "Three Stooges" come together, specific prayers for specific members, Acts 2.47.....oh man, God.  it comes out of nowhere -- and that's how i know its You.  Thank you so much, Jesus!

yesterday, we broke fast together and we closed out the night singing "How He Loves."  idk....God loves them so much....and in the trials and spiritual battle that is to come (as mentioned in the first paragraph of this ridiculously long post), i hope and pray that they will remember that God loves them sooooo much.  and may that beautiful and overwhelming love carry them through and give them the hope they need to persevere and press on. 

Oh, how He loves...Blind Side

thank you so much, Jesus for every good and perfect gift that you give us, gifts that we dont ask for and yet you give, gifts like older sisters and continuing "discipleship" relationships.  thank You for how much you love my lg members even when i dont nearly love them enough as i should.  thank You so much for the victory that You won for us, the victory we have when we fight against spiritual battle -- we've already won!  thank You for winning that for us already.